the Quiet Joy of Giving (Copy)

Written By Lucie Jansen

WHY HELPING OTHERS HEALS US TOO

There’s a particular kind of happiness that doesn’t shout. It doesn’t flash across a screen or arrive in a notification. It settles gently in your chest.

We see it at F.E.R.A.L.

It’s there when a child carefully hands a warm plate of food to someone doing it tough. It’s there when a young person sits, really sits, beside an elderly resident in a care home—listening to stories that stretch back decades. It’s there when muddy hands press a new sapling into the soil.

We’ve watched children cook for people experiencing homelessness. We’ve watched them spend afternoons in aged care homes, playing games and hearing stories from residents whose faces light up at the company. Each time, something subtle but powerful happens. The recipients are delighted—but so are the children. They leave taller somehow. Calmer. More connected.

And science helps explain why.

Researchers sometimes refer to the “helper’s high”—the emotional lift people feel after doing something kind. In one well-known study from Harvard Business School, participants who spent money on others reported feeling happier than those who spent it on themselves. Across broader research reviews, volunteering has been consistently linked with higher life satisfaction and improved mental wellbeing.

But beyond the data, the mechanism feels deeply human.

When we help someone else, our world gets bigger.

So much of modern life pulls us inward—to our pressures, our performance, our phones. Helping others gently shifts the focus outward. It interrupts rumination. It reminds us we matter. It creates real, face-to-face connection.

There’s something especially powerful about intergenerational connection. In aged care homes, children and elderly residents meet at opposite ends of life’s arc—yet the impact is mutual. Older adults benefit from companionship and stimulation; young people gain perspective, empathy and a sense of continuity. It’s hard to feel isolated when you’re laughing across a table with someone 70 years older than you.

And then there’s the planet.

Caring for bushland, beaches or local green spaces is also an act of service. It says, this place matters. Studies summarised in the World Happiness Report highlight a consistent link between prosocial behaviour—helping, donating, volunteering—and higher reported wellbeing worldwide. When kindness rises, so does happiness.

In Australia, formal volunteering rates have fluctuated over time, and they dipped during the pandemic years. Yet informal helping—neighbours, community groups, shared acts of care—remains common and deeply woven into our culture. The instinct to help is still there. Sometimes we just need the invitation.

At F.E.R.A.L, volunteering isn’t an add-on. It’s part of how we nurture resilience and leadership. Cooking together for those in need builds teamwork and gratitude. Visiting older members of our community builds empathy and confidence. Environmental projects build responsibility and pride.

The change we see isn’t dramatic or loud. It’s quieter.

Children speak more thoughtfully. They listen better. They look people in the eye. They realise they have something meaningful to offer—not someday, but now.

Looking after our communities and our environment doesn’t just benefit the recipients. It strengthens the givers. It creates belonging. It reminds young people that happiness is not something you scroll into—it’s something you build, together.

And perhaps that is the deepest lesson of all: joy grows when it is shared.

Further Reading

Lucie Jansen
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